Dr harveys office called and said that Jax's bloodwork was normal except for showing high levels of inflammation. They couldn't tell us where or why or what is causing the inflammation so we ARE going to Arkansas Childrens Hospital. They are sending us to the center for infectious disease. Those words all in the same sentence are terrifying, especially when being used about MY son. I don't know what the he'll is going to happen once we are there. what are they going to do to my sweet baby boy? What kind of tests? They DO realize that he is not a pin cushion right? He's really scared of needles, like me. Will he be just another patient to them or will they take good care of him and answer his questions in a comforting way? Will they answer ours? Our appointment is July 25th, BUT they can call us at anytime before then if there I'd a cancellation since we are on a wait list and we would have to go down sooner, maybe even the same day. They said that we don't know what will happen once we go. Yiu know what's crazy? I kept asking WHY is this happening...and I realized that I need to be asking WHAT god wants us to learn from this. there has to be a lesson somewhere, but what is it?? I guess it isn't time to figure the answer out yet since we have to go through the experience to learn the lesson.
side note** I also caught myself thinking about trying to focus on weight loss with all of this going on. Selfish, selfish,selfish. I am a horrible person for the thought even crossing my mind. But if I don't take care of me...I won't be alive to take care of my kids in scary situations. I feel like the walls are caving in. And I've been having dizzy spells A LOT. Inwonder if something is going on there.
Thanks again for your prayers and encouragement. <3
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